I’m a splayd person. I come from a splayd family. My mum instilled splayd pride in all her children, as this eating utensil was designed by an Australian – a Sydneysider, no less. William McArthur invented his combo of fork, knife and spoon in the 1940s. I actually find the experience of eating less enjoyable with anything but a splayd. But hey, I’m riddled with crockery and cutlery prejudices. Don’t get me started on coffee mugs.

Anyway, I picked up this velvet box of splayds in Newtown today. There is nothing wrong with second-hand cutlery, because when you think about it, every fork or spoon you’ve ever used has been in someone elses mouth. Unless you’re in the habit of carrying around your own personal-use splayd.