Fritter Anxiety

A Hello Sucker Update.

So I made the first two recipes from my Hello Sucker box and they were both…mmm…how should I say….horrible? Na that’s too harsh. Bland. Gluggy. Over-cabbaged. I got leftovers spilling out of my refrigerator. Now I have just one recipe left and it’s causing me a bit of internal anguish. I’m racked with Fritter Anxiety. I have to get these suckers made before the ingredients rot (I didn’t have enough room in my fridge or I was…mmm…how should I say….lazy) and the big box of zucchinis is taking up a lot of space in my brain and crowding out other thoughts. I’ll be going about my day and suddenly I’ll think “fritters” (imagine that said in the Seinfeld voice a la “Newman”).

Side Story: When I was a young and eager mother, I would often go through different stages of trying to be perfect (all short lived). I once slaved for hours making fritters for my then 3 year old Angus. I remembered loving fritters that my mum used to make. The fritters didn’t go down too well with Angus, and I later found them in the bin. I was distraught – tired, emotional, fritter-fatigued – I questioned Angus harshly on why he put his dinner in the bin. The adorable little man told me truthfully that he didn’t like “flatties”.

fritters

Some fritter related slogans that keep popping up in my head:

Fritters aren’t for Quitters

Fuck Fritters

The Anti-Fritter League

BREAKING NEWS

Fritters are off the menu. I just got the zucchinis out of the box and they have mutated! Gone is the once voluptuous form and in it’s place is a knobbly, bunion-like appearance. Hello Mutant Vegetables.

mutant zuchinis

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